So if members of the fellowship had to fight to the death against each other, how would each battle turn out? Wonder no longer, my friend! Here's a handy guide you can refer to in order to impress those lovely ladies (or just creep them out and be alone forever).
Legolas vs Gimli
If they start out a few paces away from each other (normal human paces) Legolas would win hands down. His bowetry (I love making up words) is so superb there's no way Gimli would make it within axe range of him. Legolas would take Gimli out before anyone could say, “Holy crap! Elves and dwarves aren't real! These drugs are awesome.”
If, however, they start within axe range of each other, I think Gimli would win. Not right away, of course. Legolas would jump out of the way a few times, try to shoot a few arrows, but I think Gimli could defend himself and eventually get a good killing blow in there.
Legolas vs Aragorn
This one's difficult. Initially I thought Legolas would win. But Aragorn's reflexes and all around awesomeness is better than a normal human's. I think this would be the most even fight in the fellowship. They're both superior fighters with their chosen weapons. So I'm changing my mind. Aragorn is the winner. Plus I just like him more than Legolas.
Aragorn vs Gimli
Aragorn. Definitely. Gimli could probably put up a pretty good fight. But his fighting technique is slow and brutish compared to Aragorn's.
Boromir vs Aragorn
Aragorn. I don't have to explain why do I?
Boromir vs Legolas
Legolas
Boromir vs Gimli
Gimli (Sorry Boromir but you were the only one in the fellowship to actually die. You're kind of a pussy).
Frodo vs Sam
Frodo would win. He's just more apathetic. He's always seemed like a stronger character. Don't get me wrong, I think Sam would put up an amazing fight. I mean yeah Frodo was the one to bring the ring all the way to Mount Doom (which is totally a volcano and so they could have just ridden the eagles to it and dropped the ring down the fucking top) but guess who was the only one in the fellowship to stick with him the entire way, even when Frodo tried to ditch him. Oh shit. Maybe Sam would win. No. I'm going to stick with Frodo. If not for any other reason than the fact that Sam loves Frodo and would have a fundamental problem killing him, even if put in a situation where he had to in order to survive. Sam's just not that kind of hobbit. That's why he's always been one of my absolute favorite of the fellowship.
Merry vs Pippin
I think Merry would win. Pippin's the troublemaker. He's always screwing things up. I love Pippin but Merry could kick his ass if he had to.
But here's the thing about the hobbits. Any two hobbit put against any other one person in the fellowship would win. Especially if it was Merry and Pippin or Sam and Frodo. They would fight so hard to protect each other no other person in the fellowship would win. And if you put Merry and Pippin vs Sam and Frodo... ...um I really don't know. I'm calling it a tie. If anything happened to one of either pair, the other would epically hulk out on the others.
I love LOTR.
Syd
No comments:
Post a Comment